Thursday, May 22, 2008

Here Kitty Kitty

If you read the old blog you may remember that nine months or so ago I responded to the news that my wife of one week was pregnant by trying to write a book about a beaver, which somehow seemed like a reasonable response at the time. I put together something like 13 chapters and then my brain broke and I laid in bed for a week meowing like a cat. Then, I decided to turn it into a screenplay because screenplays have less pages and I am very lazy. Several months, countless drafts, and much meowing later I finished said screenplay. And in what is surely a sign of both the apocalypse and the untapped market for beaver related films, on Monday someone decided to take it off my hands.

Last time I sold something I got engaged. We had dinner at a swell restaurant, met our friends for drinks, and stayed in a hotel. This time we ate cold pizza and slept in different parts of house with our individual twins. From now on when someone asks me about having children I will tell them this story.

Writers of any real ability probably do not bother to celebrate when they make deals for their scripts. After all, it is just the first in an endless series of steps that rarely result in a film actually being made. But I am not a writer of any real ability so I have to celebrate while the celebrating is good. This may be my only opportunity to stand on top of something and shout that I am the 'king of the world'. But I will not do that because I think a global monarchy would be disastrous.

Really, I think of it like winning the lottery or becoming the dictator of a small country. Sure I'll probably end up in a trailer or ousted by a junta, but for now I am free to buy zebra furniture and make my birthday a national holiday.

Probably should have just picked one of those two analogies . Both was confusing. See? I'm a total hack.

I'm still excited though.

Meow.

7 comments:

Heather said...

Congrats on the real live sale of something you wrote! Too bad you didn't get to celebrate it properly, but cold pizza ain't so bad. And who knows, maybe one day you'll look back at it and laugh.

It's really not a screenplay about beavers, is it? I'm not sure I'm in the right demographic for that to be particularly appealing, so I'm hoping that's a metaphor for something more...compelling.

Jason said...

Although you may bemoan your lack of maturity (or is it loss of immaturity?), think of this: I have not managed to produce offspring (and I'm older than you), and every time, EVERY TIME, I see the word "beaver" I chuckle.

Congrats on the beaver film. See? Funny.

Michael said...

Beavers are funny. Especially thirsty ones.

And overuse of analogies aside, I would guess the screenplay in one way or another probably really is about beavers. I suppose that significantly improves the chances that the movie will be made with Jason Lee in the lead role.

Whichever the case, it's very cool to hear about the success. Hopefully #2 resources you as much or more as #1 since you have 200% more diapers and dimetap to purchase. Congatulations!

Bob Killen said...

Congrats on the script purchase. This one went down quick and you really deserve a fast turn around on this. As one of your trusted readers I must say it was a great piece of work.

I enjoyed seeing the kids, the photos shoot and will get along with the prints.

TwoBusy said...

Beavers, cats, zebras and twins... oh, my.

Matt said...

Hey brother, I can't wait to see your great work on the big screen. Congrats!!!!!

ten out of ten said...

Yea! Congrats.

 
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